Anyone ever notice how caught up we can get in friendships? I can’t be the only one who has! As we get older, certain things naturally become less important, but some things like the desire to be loved and cared for will never be outgrown, no matter who we are or where we are in life.
It is an unfortunate truth that I have probably spent years of my life gauging my self worth through the lens of friendships. It was a misplaced way of finding purpose and feeling special. One day I would feel important and wanted! But, those feelings never stayed, because you see, our friendships are imperfect, just like us.
Friendships are not meant to fulfill the role that can only be filled by Christ. Even our girlfriends with the best of intentions will let us down. If we measure our self-worth with how others treat and see us, we will be disappointed and hurt every time.
We are worthy and special because of what Jesus did for us on the cross! And, did you know that Jesus has called us, those who love Him, HIS friend? Let that sink in. We are a part of the Jesus clique! Not because there is anything special about us, but because of how awesome our God is! And as friends of Jesus, we are called to love others the way Jesus loves us!
We already have the only Friend we will ever need. Therefore, it frees us up to be true friends to others. My self-worth and my purpose is not caught up with whether my friend ignored my text message or forgot my birthday. I’m free from that and I can show them love despite the circumstances. In turn, they can see Jesus through me.
Jesus’s version of friendship, that we are called to emulate with others, is not one of self gratification or selfish gain, but of self sacrifice. We should not look at our friendships from the lens of our emotions, but rather through a Christ-like love that we receive from abiding in Him! If we seek to love Christ with all of our hearts, we will naturally love others and have encouraging and fulfilling friendships!
And one last note of worth: Jesus *chose you to be His friend.
John 15:16a says, “You did not choose Me but I chose you, and appointed you that you would go and bear fruit- fruit that will last.”
He chose us, therefore we choose to prayerfully bear fruit by loving others. Jesus, the friend of sinners, has commanded us to be friends. To lay down our lives in friendship and love. We are not bound by a need for friendship with others, but rather are compelled by Christ’s love to be the friends that others need.